No awkward lesbian experiences without me
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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