Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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