Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
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