How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
