new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Randomize
