You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
