Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Randomize
