I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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