It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
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