Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
