Taylor Swift is so right about you.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
