Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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