I feel like abortions should bother me more
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
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