D3 body, D1 cock
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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