I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
