Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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