i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
