Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Randomize