You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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