summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize