Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
