How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
