I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
