He is such a slut. More and more my type.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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