I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
