Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
