Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
