and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm sobbing to NWA
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize