hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
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