Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
