Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Randomize
