this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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