I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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