from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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