i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
