I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
