she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
stop calling my apartment porn island.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
