u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
