i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
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