...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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