Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
