and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
