At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
