how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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