Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
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