Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
