You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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