Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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