And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
