Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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