Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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